CSS Validation Serious Humor

18th February 2004 · Last updated: 5th October 2016
 

This is an original atom feed post by The Literary Moose published on the 18 February 2004. Note: "pigs" refers to errors, not humans!

Comments


Recently there was a big hoopla about a CSS Validator error. I guess some pigs are more equal than others on the CSS animal farm. I briefly wondered why no one tears the hair off their heads because of less glamorous errors which have been there since last summer. I wonder no more. I am having a good laugh instead. The following is a collection of hilarious Validator Errors — Errors no one mourns, Errors no one loves or hugs — the penultimate abandoned Errors:

Line
CSS: whatever
Validator mumbles: Line: 0 Context :
Moi: ja, natürlich, that really helps me track my errors. Debugging never has been easier. Perhaps I could ignore all these errors if they all without exception show on line zero?
Transparent
CSS: background-color: transparent;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : background-colortransparent is not a color value : transparent
Moi: why, of course it isn't! I am grateful for a million of errors on all my stylesheets.
Table Display
CSS: display: table;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : displaytable is not a display value : table
Moi: number, huh? Wot, should I put 7 or 19 there, my friend? Table indeed is not a valid number, never has been. Too bad for the table. Too badder for the display property, haha.
@page
CSS: @media print and (width: 21cm) and (height: 29.7cm) {@page {margin: 3cm;}}
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : heightParse Error - @page {margin: 3cm;}
Moi: height… height! Did you say height? Parse error for height?
@page encore
CSS: @media print and (width: 21cm) and (height: 29.7cm) {@page {margin: 3cm;}}
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : heightParse error - Unrecognized : }
Moi: this is the same line which has an error, my friend: line zero. Shall I say that I felt dumb when I read this? Nah, it's simply that the Validator has a peculiar sense of humor.
Color
CSS: color: #CBCFDC;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : color#cbcfdc is not a color value : #cbcfdc
Moi: of course. Absolutely not. I propose that this color be deleted from computer displays.
Background Color
CSS: background-color: #010101;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : background-color#010101 is not a background-color value : #010101
Moi: likewise, this color, too, must be immediately deleted from computer displays. Any software that refuses to comply will lose the compatibility standard badge of honor.
Bottom Border
CSS: border-bottom: 1px solid #010101;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : border-bottomParse Error - [empty string]
Moi: oh dear… Suffer the little children! Ze hungry Validator Volf just ate ze string!
Left Border
CSS: border-left: 1px solid #010101;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : border-leftParse Error - [empty string]
Moi: do I need to tell you that ze Validator Volf ist getting more hungry?
Border
CSS: border: 1px solid #010101;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : borderParse Error - [empty string]
Moi: ouch, ze Validator Volf ate all our borders! Nichts in der basket zum essen anymore!
Font Size
CSS: font-size: 100%;
Validator mumbles: Invalid number : font-size83% is not a font-size value : 83%
Moi: at least 83 is a number, eh? You got that right, brother. I thought that if 83 was too difficult to imagine for you, you wouldn't protest at 100? 70? Nah, you greedy bastard. You must have it all, don't you?

Enough? I ommitted all CSS3 "errors" or we wouldn't have finished by tomorrow. Not enough??? Here is a selection of humorous warnings. I consider myself warned.

Cursor
CSS: cursor: text;
Validator mumbles: Line : 0 Property cursor doesn't exist for media
Moi: er… which media did you say? Which line did you say?
Outline
CSS: outline: 1px dotted #010101;
Validator mumbles: Line : 0 Property outline doesn't exist for media
Moi: outline too? This must be some mysterious sort of media. I am getting suspicious.
Text-indent, max-width, text-align, padding, display, font-style, position, font-weight, text-decoration, background-color, color, margin, font-size, padding-left, border-left, float, visibility, vertical-align, font-family, width, list-style, content, border-width,
CSS: oh please
Validator mumbles: Line : 0 Property font-family doesn't exist for media
Moi: all of the above do not exist for media which isn't specified. This would be ridiculous, if it weren't so funny.
Max Width
CSS: max-width: 98%;
Validator mumbles: Line : 0 98% might not be supported by the medium atsc-tv
Moi: and this is what I hear when I validate a handheld CSS file.

The above results come from two stylesheets I validated. Now, do not dare tell me, do not even think of telling me to stuff myself and contribute code or resources if I want to continue complaining. I am not complaining. I am laughing my antlers off. For a variety of reasons. Wot, the errors ain't good enough to write about in blogs, tear the hair off or sprinkle them with fluid tar? Ver is dat asch on your heads??? Ver is ze state of emergency? Ver ist ze drama? The irony is just too gross, even for me. Valid CSS, my antler.

I don't need no stinking validation badges. Me stylesheets are foine. And if they are not, ze Validator Volf ist nicht ze tool to check for any potenziale erroren. :)

Comments (2)

Comments are locked on this topic. Thanks to everyone who posted a comment.

  1. Ray:
    Thank you, thank you, thank you. I found this page looking for a solution to a mysterious validation error:

    Line: 0 Context : div#samana input.submit
    Invalid number : border-bottomParse Error - 2px solid #872c2c

    After rechecking a million times that I had indeed entered correctly formed css rules, I went so far as to check the css file for integrity on the OS file system level. All fine. Same ugly error from Mr. CSS Validator. I had never run across anything like that before.
    I agree with you, funny how the less glamorous validator bugs never make it into the limelight of professional scrutiny. And sad, because the validator has the potentioal to be a really nice debugging tool if it worked as expected. Yet let's have faith in the future, after all, there are many dedicated people working on the project.

    Anyway, thanks again for making me feel less of an idiot.

    Posted in June 2004 at 7:25 pm
  2. David Okunmuyide:
    Usefully hilarious!!
    Sorry.. hilariously useful!! Or whatever is correct. :-D
    Anyhow thanks Chris for this expose!;-);-)

    Posted on 19th November 2004 at 4:44 pm